I was coaching a woman in her 50s with a new sales technique, in the way she held her body, the language it spoke I knew that she wasn’t able to exhibit confidence because she didn’t believe she was enough.
A man, head of his department of a national company, didn’t believe he was doing a good enough job. He believed he was shit at everything. I challenged this. He wasn’t. He didn’t believe he was enough.
Another man, in his late 60s, firmly placed in a C-Suite position cried when at the core of his nasty, narcissistic, bullying behaviour was a small boy longing to be loved who held tight to the belief he wasn’t enough.
A few years ago, I didn’t believe I was enough either. I couldn’t look in the mirror without hating my appearance. I hated my face, my nose, my double chin. I hated my arse, my thighs, and the extra flubber on my stomach. I had lived conditioned to the standards of beauty that said nothing that I had was enough. It took being the student, the coach and client of NLP and Hypnotherapy to learn the skills needed to change this belief permanently.
What We Believe is Not Fact
A belief is a decision made at a single point in time that is a fact for you. Most of the time our beliefs are based on a set of circumstances completely out of our control. The beliefs we create about ourselves are no different.
It’s almost too simple but it has to be said, the number one problem that my Emotional Intelligence Leadership Coaching clients experience is that they do not believe they are enough.
A Tool to Commence Change
In lieu of coming to see me to permanently resolve your problems, you can start coaching your unconscious mind to believe differently. Print this card. Multiple copies. Paste it everywhere. Write the words in every mirror. Add the words to a phone alarm that dings multiple times a day. Make it your screen saver.
I am enough.
And you are.
H/T to Marisa Peer for her amazing work.
Until soon, always, your EQL coach,